The Best…. And … Worst Excuses

[trader1]

Our fellow member @Nehoma wrote in an earlier thread his explanation of his SO finding lipstick on his drawers— plausible or not, I found it amusing -

Curious to hear from all, what, if any excuses you’ve had to come up with when confronted—

Fortunately I’ve never had too, but a buddy from many years ago was whoring and drinking around one night , made it home and passed out on kitchen floor , minus his socks ( he was fully clothed in suit/tie when he left in am )..

Wife finds him in the AM and he told her he stepped in a puddle and had to throw his socks away the night before..Can’t say of the streets were wet or dry

They divorced a short time later

 

[genius]

Joke apropos to this thread:

So a big guy Joe is in the locker room and changing into his workout attire. When he takes off his pants his buddy Jack is amazed to see that he is wearing a tiny pair of pink panties.

Jack: WTF - why are you wearing those!

Joe: my wife went into my glove box in my car and found these. She said "what are these doing here! "

Jack: So what did you say?

Joe: The best idea I could come up with was "sweetheart, I'm embarrassed to say that I have a little fetish and I wear them after I leave home."

Wife: "Oh, don't worry about it." And then she said with fire in her eyes and glaring at me "feel free to wear these all f**king week!